Years have gone by and you’re still single. You thought that at this age you would already be married with one, two or three children. But no. The wedding can wait, but the idea of having children seems to have an expiration date. When the biological clock starts ringing, what do you do as a Christian? 

The Bible is clear: the marriage bed, where both partners have sex, is reserved for married couples (Hebrews 13.4). The man will leave his father and his mother, unite to his wife, and then they will become one flesh (Genesis 2:24). Sex always comes after marriage, according to the Bible. So, no marriage, no sex … and no children?

According to the Biblical order of things, a single person should not have children. Even modern psychology attests, there is nothing better for a child than having a father and a mother. But what if you really have the desire to become a parent and you are still single?

First of all, this is what you cannot do: have extramarital adventures for the sole purpose of becoming pregnant, or to get a woman pregnant. Since it is outside marriage, it’s outside the will of God.

For the same reason, artificial insemination cannot be approved by God. When you think about it, artificial insemination is the injection of sperm from a man who is not the spouse of the patient. Even if it’s done in a laboratory, it’s no different than fornication, or if the donor is a married man, it would be adultery!

The only way to become a parent that seems to be acceptable by God is through adoption. If your desire to be a parent is more important to you than anything else, you can adopt a child. Several countries accept single people as adoptive parents. But keep this in mind : single parents have more difficulty finding a partner because that partner will need to accept your child as well. By adopting a child, you will satisfy your desire for parenthood, but you might not get married. Think about it, then choose according to what is the most important thing for you.

Do you know that when you are single and do not have a biological child, you can still exercise your parental skills? You can invest in the life of a child… that belongs to someone else! In the Creole language, the word “godmother” translates to “co-mother”. It’s a clear and practical way to explain the role of a godmother. She is a teammate of the biological mother. A godmother can provide rest to the biological mother by taking care of the child, spoiling the child, teaching it, and more. Same thing goes for a godfather.

You can have a major and positive impact in the life of a child who will never bear your name. Isn’t that the goal of parenting? To help a child and watch them grow in grace and wisdom? Instead of being discouraged when your biological clock starts ringing, turn to your nephews, nieces, or even to the children of overwhelmed parents. Give them all your parental love. Everyone wins!