Many singles are much closer to marriage than they think. One sin - so only one thing to repent from, separates them from the love of their life. That sin has nothing to do with sex.

His heart is bursting with love for Christ, he looks clean and is helpful, but he is too shy to ever talk to a girl. Even when he spends time with his friends, he remains quiet; he prefers to watch and listen. She loves God with all her strength, she has obtained professional success and she is popular with her friends. When a charming Christian man shows interest in her, she immediately closes the door. She could never date a man who doesn’t have an amazing career. What would her family say?!

What do these two have in common? The same sin of pride.

One of the definitions of “Pride” in the Oxford dictionary is the “consciousness of one’s own dignity, the quality of having an excessively high opinion of oneself or one’s importance.” The proud man is very sensitive to the opinions of others. He has a constant need for praise and admiration. He wants to be the center of everything and be his own boss. He does not like competition unless he is sure of victory. When he wants something, he puts all his effort into acquiring it, without any advice. He tells God what to do, and is often legalistic and religious. Shyness also hides pride. When we are afraid of being judged or rejected, it’s because we give a lot of importance to ourselves. A shy person needs the approval of others to open up.

Do not take pride lightly. Think about it, it’s the sin that drove Lucifer out of Heaven! It’s the sin that pushed Adam and Eve to eat the forbidden fruit. Pride puts our “self” first, before God, which only leads to negative consequences in our lives. Pride prevents us from connecting with other human beings. It also often prevents us from entering our calling.

How do you get rid of that ugly sin? The same way we do for all sins : through repentance. Acts 3.19 (NKJV) says : “Repent therefore and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, so that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord”. We must ask forgiveness, and convert: that is to turn away, to renounce pride and walk in the opposite direction.

The opposite of pride is not showing no restraint or having no self-esteem. The opposite of shyness is not to be arrogant. The opposite of pride is humility. James 4.6 (NKJV) says : “But He gives more grace. Therefore He says: God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”

Humility is building our self-esteem on what God says about us, not on our talents. When we are humble, we are not offended by rejection or criticism. We can be patient with others and accept them as God does. The humble person wants God’s will be fulfilled, for God to be at the center of everything. “Pride leads only to shame; it is wise to be humble.” (Proverbs 11.2 NCV)

Imagine your life without shyness, without pride. Imagine interacting with the other sex in complete humility. Refreshing, isn’t? Therefore renounce pride, truly repent and be clothed with humility (Ephesians 4.1-3).

Remember to test your heart regularly. Pride is very active in this world and tends to return to our lives.