Jesus was tempted in the wilderness before He entered His calling. Here are the three temptations that He overcame brilliantly. Singles face temptations as well, and here are the three biggest ones singles have to face.

The first temptation is to take control of the situation. God is not quick enough to answer, then I’ll do it myself! Whether in love or any other area, choosing to take the reins is never a good idea for several reasons. First, we often start to look in the wrong places. We’re looking for a quick fix instead of waiting on God and following Him wherever He leads us.

When we take control, our thoughts become overwhelmed by the quest for a solution. We fail to think about anything else, we are continuously looking for ideas to meet our needs. Inevitably we will lose the peace of Christ, but since the quest is exciting, we don’t realize we are not in God’s rest.

Taking the lead prevents us from hearing the alarm signals that God sends us. He knows all things and He is ready to reveal them to us if we walk in His will. Isaiah 45.3 (NIV) says: “I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.”

Here is an example, consider the story of Saul. He had to wait for the prophet Samuel to offer a sacrifice to God. However, he could not wait any longer so he took matters in hand and he did it himself. An impatient decision that cost him his throne and even prevented his son from becoming king. (1 Samuel 13.8-14)

God does not want us to be totally inactive, waiting for a life partner, but He does not want us to become our own little god and take control of the situation. “Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God and serve him only.’” (Luke 4.8 NIV)

The second temptation is to compromise. This often comes right after the first temptation! A young woman wanted to marry a man of God that is passionate about his faith. Then time passes and this man is nowhere to be found. Then, she changes her criteria a little. She hopes to find someone who participates at least once a week in his church. Then, a little while later, she changes her criteria again : “he must believe in God”. She continues to change her criteria to “he has to at least respects the fact that I believe in God”. And of course, eventually, the spiritual aspect will completely disappear from her list of criteria.

It is difficult to stand firm on our standard, especially when our desires are increasingly urgent, or when time passes. We see unsaved people get what they want more quickly than us. This feeling describes Asaph in Psalm 73. Until verse 16, he envies the life of the “wicked” who do not comply with the standards of God’s children. But in verse 17 (NIV), he changes his attitude because he “entered the sanctuary of God”. When we approach God, then we see life through His eyes, and His standards again become obvious and essential.

While you are still single you can revisit your criteria. Perhaps there are some criteria that are exaggerated or not important. But there is one that should always be essential and non-negotiable for a child of God: to marry someone who shares the same faith and the same passion for Christ.

The third temptation is to be discouraged. Whether it is because our effort has not produced anything, or because we have been waiting on God for years, the temptation of getting discouraged is very big. We begin to believe the voices who tell us that we will never get married. We let bad words invade us and we let them gradually destroy our self-esteem. Some people become completely depressed, while others become very bitter and cynical.

This discouragement threatens not only singles but all those who trust in God for a promise. Yes, we may have made some mistakes that put us where we are, but we shouldn’t focus on these missteps. If you believe in God’s forgiveness, go and rebuild your faith on it. Refuse discouragement. Your promise “will certainly come” (Habakkuk 2.3 NIV). Go read Romans chapter 4 and learn from the heroes of faith. “Being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised.” (Romans 4.21 NIV)

Whatever temptations come before you (because you will indeed be tempted, one way or another), answer them as Jesus did: with the Word. Read it and apply it; that’s why it’s there! Oh, and by the way, Jesus was tempted because He was walking in the right direction. If you are being tempted encourage yourself, it means you are on the right track too!