The Holy Spirit is a great help to us in all areas, including the challenges of being single. He is supporting us through his love, joy, peace, and patience, as we saw last week. Now, let us look at five other benefits.
The 5th benefit: He frees us from laziness, thanks to His goodness.
Working on our love life requires effort. That doesn’t mean we should “take matters into our own hands”, but neither should we wait for our future husband or future wife to come knocking on the door of our basement. When the Holy Spirit is active in our lives, He leads us to do good deeds, for His goodness flows through us. We don’t only say that we are Christians, we do the actions that confirm our confession. “So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.” (James 2.17 ESV)
The 6th benefit: He removes jealousy and envy by His kindness
Being a maid of honor is a great experience. Except, when we are a maid of honor for the 5th or 6th time! We smile for the pictures, but deep inside our hearts begin to sprout envy or jealousy. We can do good things, that is, manifest goodness, but if we don’t have the goodness in our hearts, we lack kindness. A good relationship with the Holy Spirit allows us to fill this lack. “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.” (Romans 12.15 ESV) When you are tempted to be envious or jealous, ask the Holy Spirit to show you the blessings He has in store for you. Just because your friend found a nice husband that does not mean there are no more good matches for you!
The 7th benefit: He helps us not to compromise, because of His faithfulness
The scenario is a classic: a young woman, newly professed Christian, is proud to say that she will marry only a future pastor! Then the years pass, and the woman begins to despair. “My future husband will be a Christian,” she says. More years pass and her dream becomes: “My future husband will let me go to church”. Until it completely eliminates the essential and non-negotiable criterion of all unmarried Christians: seeking a partner that is on fire for God.
It is not bad to review our list of criteria from time to time, but we must never compromise on the essential and necessary criteria. (For more on the subject, read this other article.) “One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much, and one who is dishonest in a very little is also dishonest in much.” (Luke 16.10 ESV) And it is one of the benefits of a good relationship with the Holy Spirit: He helps us to be faithful to our standards of holiness.
The 8th benefit: He doesn’t let us develop pride, thanks to His meekness
It is important to know our value; we must all seek to have a good self-esteem. On the other hand, we must be careful not to overestimate ourselves, that is, to develop pride and expect to be served by our future partner. (Read this article on this topic.)
The word “meekness” regarding the benefits of having a relationship with the Holy Spirit, can also be translated by having a servant attitude. It is not to deny the strength and qualities that we have, but to choose to put them at the disposal of others. “But it shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant.” (Mark 10.43 ESV)
The 9th benefit: He cools down our sexual impulses by giving us self-control
Even if we are born again, we may be tempted by the desires of the flesh. Especially if we already had an active sex life. Yet the Bible is clear: “But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints.” (Ephesians 5.3 ESV) If you feel that you need self-control in this area, speak with the Holy Spirit when the thoughts come. Imagine that He is there, by your side, and you will see that your desires will cool down quickly! “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” (James 4.7 ESV) (Read this other article on this subject.)
These are the last five benefits of having a good relationship with the Holy Spirit. If you missed the first four, read the article from last week. If you do not see these benefits at work in your life, do not condemn yourself. Consider this as a warning sign to encourage you to return to your source and be filled with the Spirit of God.
(This and the following article are from the September 23, 2017, conference. You can view it in full on our YouTube channel.)