Sometimes, we feel that our love life is under some kind of curse. We pray, search and feel that we are a good candidate for marriage, but we feel invisible. What if our love life was bounded spiritually?

Many passages in the Bible show that there is a real connection between what happens in the physical and the spiritual. When Jesus prayed for some sick, for example, He also made sure to free people from their sins. Why? Because illness, and many other physical problems, can be caused by sins. When we do the opposite of what God asks, we open the door to all kinds of problems. After eating the forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve were cast out of the garden and their lives were placed under a curse.

There are different types of curses, and we talk more about this in our next book (which will be published soon!). But the most common form are the ones we place on our own life by our words. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue; those who love it will eat its fruit.” Proverbs 18:21 (WEB). “A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but deceit in it crushes the spirit.” Proverbs 15:4 (WEB).

We must pay attention to what we declare about our lives. In moments of discouragement, we can place a curse on our relationships by our words. “That’s it, I’m never going to get married!” “Me, I only attract unfaithful men!” “There is not a girl who will want me.” Sometimes, these words seem logical; that is why we repeat them and believe in what we say. In private coaching, we received a young woman who complained about dating only violent men. “But that’s normal, with my fiery character”, she said. She was not wrong, when we have anger issues, we will rarely meet a partner soft as a dove! But with a firm statement like that, she could not get out of her condition. She needed to change her character, let the sweetness of the Holy Spirit take more space in her life, and then change her words.

Sometimes we can even say words that look good. For example, we could say, “I will not get married until I bring 500 souls to Christ.” It is a very laudable goal, but since we are not responsible for the decision of others, we risk blocking our destiny. Sometimes what we do for God is even more than what God asks of us! The Bible is clear about what we promise to God. “When you make a vow to the Lord your God, you shall not delay to pay it, for it would be sin in you, [a]and the Lord your God will surely require it of you. 22 However, if you refrain from vowing, it would not be sin in you.” (Deuteronomy 23: 21-22 NASB)

Finally, there are also the curses that someone else pronounced on your life. For example, if your mother says to you: “You, you will never be able to find a respectable girl!” Or if a friend says to you: “You will only find your husband if you manage to lose 20 kilos”. No matter what words people say about you or your ability to meet your future spouse, refuse them! Do not let anyone sow weeds in the field of your faith.

Even if you refuse to believe that a spiritual connection is created when speaking, admit that these words can sabotage your faith. They can sow discouragement, lower your self-esteem, and you could start acting exactly like the bad words spoken to you. In one way or another, you must refuse words that do not accord with the Word of God. This is the solution to all these bad words pronounced on your love life. You refuse them, you repent if these words came from you, and you let the blood of Jesus break the bonds. “Christ redeemed us from the curse of the Law, having become a curse for us for it is written, “Cursed is everyone who hangs on a tree” in order that in Christ Jesus the blessing of Abraham might come to the Gentiles, so that we would receive the promise of the Spirit through faith.” (Galatians 3: 13-14 KJV).