Unless we are a zombie, we make all our decisions for a specific reason. In fact, when you think about it, even zombies have a goal! But our motivations are not always good. Some self-examination is necessary.
We are a people that are set apart, our motivations to undertake a project are different from those of the world. At least they should be different! For example, when we know that God is the one who provides for our needs (Matthew 6:31-32), we do not work for a salary. We choose a job where we can be a light in the darkness, a position where we can use our talents and be an example of excellence with a servant spirit (Colossians 3:22). As children of God, we know that our Father is infinitely rich (Philippians 4:19) and we do not need to depend on a job to see our needs met. Obviously, God uses our job in part to meet our needs, but we know that our ultimate boss is God. If God wants us there, no one can stop us from having that position.
It is important to always keep this in mind so that we don’t succumb to the selfish motives of the world. If our motivation in going to work changes and we start to see our job as our financial source, we will start living in fear of losing it. We could easily accept compromises to our faith to safeguard our position. Or we could begin to covet a job with better pay and set aside the Kingdom of God to reach the bigger pay. (Mark 4:19). In short, if we do not pay attention to our motives, we can quickly become like the world (Romans 12:2).
The same goes for our motivation for serving God. We should not serve to attract attention or to gain a specific title, or worse, for financial gain (1 Peter 5:2)! Sometimes we can undertake a project for God with the right motivation: we really want to help and serve other Christians, or because we want to see souls saved. But after a while, often after facing some challenges, we sometimes diverge from our initial motivation. We begin to look for human strategies to achieve goals that we have set ourselves but were not inspired by God. Then we start talking about “our ministry” as if it belonged to us! We move from the servant position to the position of president, and we make decisions accordingly. Therefore, it is good to keep in mind our initial motivation, the one that God laid on our hearts when He called us.
In the same way, we need to make sure that our motivation to get married is the right one because our reasons can be wrong! Do not get married to have a slave who will meet all your needs! Marriage is the union of two (imperfect) people who both desire to make each other happy and who will do everything in all things to serve the other. Do not get married because all your friends are, or because your parents are harassing you to do it. In the same way, you do not have to get married just to have kids! Because if our marriage is motivated only by our children, it will not hold together after the children leave home.
When we have the right reason to marry, we take the appropriate steps towards fulfilling that desire. But we must remain vigilant! After a few months or years without success in our search, we can easily fall into despair or anger and our motives for finding a partner changes. It is good to stop regularly and ask yourself if your reasons are still those that God gave you. Good motivations, inspired by God, are also generally accompanied by Biblical promises and when we realign our heart on what God asks for and His promises, we find peace and trust in the waiting.
As Christians, we must really evaluate our motives in everything. Above all, it’s good to remember the reason why we gave our lives to God in the first place. Even Paul had to remind his contemporaries. “You were running well; who hindered you from obeying the truth?” (Galatians 5:7 KJV). If you are dissatisfied with your Christian life, it may be because you have forgotten your initial motivation. Return to your first love (Revelation 2:4), remember the real reason why you are a child of God and the price Christ paid for the salvation of your soul.