Opportunities sometimes arise in unexpected circumstances. To notice them and not miss them, you have to be very attentive. This principle applies to our search for a partner, but also to our relationship with God.
When we want to get married, it is important to take some steps to find that rare pearl. After all, the Bible says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22 NKJV). And to find, you have to look (Luke 11:10)! Or at least be attentive to when opportunities arise. God has a thousand ways to answer our prayers. As we draw closer to Him, we will walk in His blessings (Matthew 6:33). But finding a partner shouldn’t be the only pursuit of our life either. Most of our lives as single people should be seeking God. “But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord” (1 Corinthians 7:32 NKJV).
Isaiah 40:31 gives us a good picture of the attitude we should have. “But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint” (NKJV). The Hebrew word translated here by “wait” is “qavah”. But it’s not a passive wait. It means to wait and expect a direction. In fact, what the prophet seems to be saying here is that we will feel at rest if we place ourselves in the position of remaining attentive and awaiting a word or direction from the Lord.
We can be very busy serving God, but it will not tire us. Which reminds us of the promise of Christ. “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30 NKJV). If we are exhausted doing good works or if we are exhausted looking for a partner, it may be because we are not in the right place. Or what we are doing is not what God is asking. If we are tired and our faces are long and sad, it may be because we are not looking in the right place (Psalms 34:6).
The meaning of the Hebrew word “qavah” goes even deeper than that. When it is written that we must wait, we speak of a servant waiting for instructions from his master. He is there, at his side, ready to tend his needs. Imagine that you are a waiter in a large restaurant and someone important, a president or a king, comes into the restaurant. Then you are assigned to serve his table. You will have your eyes on the customer at all times, always ready to meet their needs as soon as they lift a finger. You will be alert and waiting to take action. That is the kind of attitude we should have before the Lord. Instead of running right and left to do lots of things, God wants us to be by His side, ready to act when He asks us to, or at rest if He has nothing for us. He desires our full attention, without distraction, without preoccupations (Matthew 13:22).
No one is better at doing that than someone single, as Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7:32! Singles should be the Christians in the Kingdom of God that are the most on fire. They should be the best connected to the heart of God. And if we develop this listening ear to the Spirit of God while we are single, we will be much better prepared to have a listening ear to our partner when we are married. Celibacy is the season in our life when we will experience the deepest relationship with God, the most intense intimacy with our Creator. So let’s take advantage of it! At the same time, we will be much more peaceful people, and we will be well-rested.