When we are angry, we are no longer rational. We may say or do things that we later regret. Anger is inevitable, but it must be tamed if we don’t want to drown in its destructive wave.
Anger is a very natural feeling. Jesus himself was angry with the merchents in the temple (Matthew 21:12-13), and God the Father was also angry with His people in the wilderness (Numbers 32:13). Getting angry is therefore not a sin, but you have to be vigilant, because it is a door that opens to sin. “When you are angry, do not sin, and be sure to stop being angry before the end of the day. Do not give the devil a way to defeat you” (Ephesians 4:26-27 NCV).
For anger can alter our testimony. If an injustice makes us angry and pushes us to react, it is positive. But if we shout insults at our neighbour because he placed his garbage in our yard, then we will have difficulty telling him about Jesus. Such negligence will certainly irritate us, but before “giving him a piece of our mind” it is best to pause and talk it over with God. It is not easy to carry the weight of our testimony. But it is better to accept some humiliation sometimes than to lose the opportunity to guide an unbeliever to salvation because of our bad character. “Do your best to live in peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18 NCV).
Anger can also alter our parental authority. Our children (of all ages!) can move us with their love, but they can also bring out the worst in us! If we raise our voices or say hurtful phrases in anger, we will lose the opportunity to educate our children. When their actions make us angry, we still need to take the time to breathe and talk to God about it. We will have their attention much more if we speak to them calmly and rationally. “Fathers, do not make your children angry, but raise them with the training and teaching of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4 NCV).
Anger can also alter our romantic relationships. It is obvious, if we explode with anger with the person we are dating, there is a good chance that this relationship will end quickly. But we must also consider all our moments of anger. Even if we are not angry with our partner, we may talk to them aggressively and be less patient with them if we are angry with our boss, neighbor, or the car that cut us off. To be a pleasant person to be around, we must learn to manage our anger well. “My dear brothers and sisters, always be willing to listen and slow to speak. Do not become angry easily, because anger will not help you live the right kind of life God wants. So put out of your life every evil thing and every kind of wrong. Then in gentleness accept God’s teaching that is planted in your hearts, which can save you” (James 1:19-21 NCV).
Anger can also alter our prayers. Frustrated with God because He does not answer our prayer quickly enough, we may begin to pray irreverently. We can read the story of Job to see how anger can alter our prayer. But being angry with our neighbor can also alter the prayers we make for them. Jesus encouraged us to pray for our enemies in a positive way, not pray for their destruction! “But I say to you, love your enemies. Pray for those who hurt you” (Matthew 5:44 NCV).
Like many other negative feelings we may experience, anger is a feeling that wants to teach us something. When we take the time to talk to ourselves, we can better assess our situation and move in the right direction. “Why am I angry? Could I react differently?” We can change our attitude by testing our heart. If you are someone who gets angry easily, gets angry a lot, or stays angry for a long time, you may want to seek help from a mental health professional before looking for a life partner.