“There is no more condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” We hear this often in churches that preach grace. So when we feel guilty, should we refuse that feeling? Not necessarily!

We resisted temptation for a while, but tonight… we gave in. We know very well what the Bible says and truly love Jesus, but our flesh has won today. After the pleasure felt by succumbing comes the feeling of guilt, shame, and condemnation. What to do with all this?

First, feeling guilty is a good sign. That is proof that the Holy Spirit truly dwells in you, and your spirit is not comfortable in this sin. It is this feeling that will lead you to repent and return to the right path. “For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death” (2 Corinthians 7:10 NLT). That is a bit of what Jesus was referring to when He spoke of a son who changes direction after thinking. “But what do you think about this? A man with two sons told the older boy, ‘Son, go out and work in the vineyard today.’ The son answered, ‘No, I won’t go,’ but later he changed his mind and went anyway. Then the father told the other son, ‘You go,’ and he said, ‘Yes, sir, I will.’ But he didn’t go. “Which of the two obeyed his father?” They replied, “The first.” Then Jesus explained his meaning: “I tell you the truth, corrupt tax collectors and prostitutes will get into the Kingdom of God before you do” (Matthew 21:28-31 NLT). If you are walking in darkness, disobedient to God, but feel no discomfort, you are already far from the heart of God.

When we feel guilt, we must use it to kneel before God and receive His forgiveness. “My dear children, I am writing this to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate who pleads our case before the Father. He is Jesus Christ, the one who is truly righteous” (1 John 2:1 NLT). By the way, we may feel guilty for doing something wrong, or not doing something right! In both cases, repentance is required.

Therefore, feeling guilty can be beneficial if it leads us to repentance. But the feeling of guilt can also lead us towards shame, and that is the wrong direction to take. Shame causes us to hide from God, like Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. And that’s the opposite of what we need! When we sin, we must go to the Father for help. The verse Hebrews 4:16 says that we must approach “boldly” the throne of grace. Other versions say to approach “with confidence” or “without fear”. Shame arises when our pride is hurt. But pride has no place in the life of a child of God. We must choose to crush our pride to approach God and admit our weakness, as well as our need for His grace.

Shame can also lead us to another feeling: that of condemnation. Condemnation is the feeling that there is no forgiveness for us, that we are lost. If your sin leads you to believe that you have gone too far and that you cannot return to God, this thought comes from the enemy. It must be refused. Because God loves us so much that He does not want any of His children to be lost. He does not like our sins, but He is ready to forgive and return us to the right path. His hand is stretched out to us, and if we accept His sacrifice on the cross, if we hide in Jesus, we need not fear being condemned. Hence the promise of Romans 8:1.

If you have difficulty getting rid of shame and the feeling of condemnation it may also be because you have not taken the time to forgive yourself. Leave your pride aside, and your desire for perfectionism. Choose to forgive yourself and give yourself another chance. After all, if God is willing to forgive you, who are you to deny yourself the same forgiveness?