Re-Marriage After Divorce

Re-marriage after divorce is a deeply personal and complex decision that must be grounded in God’s truth and guided by His Spirit. Healing, understanding biblical grounds, taking things slow, all require dependence on the Lord.

If you know me, you know that I have previously been married, divorced and re-married. If you didn’t know, well…now you do. By God’s grace, I am happily married for almost 16 years now. My first marriage ended in divorce prior to me becoming a believer, and I re-married after becoming a believer. There is a lot more to the story. I was 100% the bad-actor in the equation, but by God’s amazing grace, I am saved and changed forever by him. A helpful resource that I was pointed to in making the decision to re-marry was Jay Adams’ book “Marriage, Divorce and Re-Marriage in the Bible: A Fresh Look at What Scripture Teaches”. I highly recommend this book as there are many complex scenarios to work through and I think it is important that we work to honour God with our decisions when considering re-marriage.

Re-marriage after divorce is a journey that requires wisdom, grace, and a deep dependence on the Lord. Navigating this path involves addressing past wounds, understanding biblical grounds for remarriage, and taking things slowly. As we explore these topics, we’ll anchor ourselves in God’s Word and draw from the insights of the biblical counseling community.

Taking Time to Heal from the Past Divorce leaves a deep impact, often resulting in emotional, spiritual, and relational wounds. Before entering into a new marriage, it’s essential to take time to heal and seek God’s restoration. Scripture reminds us of God’s promise to mend the brokenhearted: “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3 ESV). Healing involves processing the pain, forgiving past offences, and addressing any unresolved sin or bitterness.

Without this intentional healing process, the wounds of the past can spill over into a new relationship, creating further challenges. This means, abiding Jesus, processing past hurt with him and finding help from brothers and sisters in Christ who are equipped to walk with you in that process.

Biblical Grounds for Re-Marriage Understanding the biblical grounds for remarriage is critical. It is a complex issue that requires seeking wisdom and prayer. The Bible acknowledges two primary situations where remarriage may be permissible:

Adultery: Jesus teaches that sexual immorality may provide grounds for divorce and remarriage: “And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9, ESV)

Abandonment by an Unbelieving Spouse: The Apostle Paul speaks to situations where an unbelieving spouse leaves the marriage: “But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.” (1 Corinthians 7:15, ESV)

Each situation must be carefully examined with pastoral guidance to ensure a wise approach with God’s Word.

The Importance of Taking Things Slow Assuming you are biblically able to re-marry, rushing into a new marriage can lead to unmet expectations and unaddressed conflicts. Proverbs provides wisdom about moving forward with caution (Proverbs 21:5). Taking time allows for spiritual growth, trust building, and seeking wise counsel.

Re-marriage after divorce is not a path to be taken lightly, but with God’s grace, it can be a journey of redemption and renewal. For those considering remarriage, seek counsel from, your pastor, other mature believers (or even consult with us) and remain rooted in prayer. As you move forward, trust in God’s sovereignty and His plan for your life, knowing that He works all things together for good (Romans 8:28).